One sci-fi item or ability I wish really existed

 I'm back on the Long and Short Review topics after some time out having chemotherapy, and I know exactly what to say to this one...

Teleportation.

I've always been a bit concerned as to how teleportation would actually work if a device was used. How would we know if the device was actually transporting the person or if the person arriving at the other end was a clone? Even if the clone had all the person's memories, the original would still have been destroyed and nobody would be any the wiser.

So what I would really like is a teleportation device that really does move the original person to the new destination. Mainly because I hate flying and would love to be able to just appear in another country without having to put myself through all that.

I'm curious to see what everyone else will say!

Foods from my geographic area that I love

 I'm back after a few weeks dealing with chemotherapy as this topic from Long and Short Reviews interested me.

I grew up in Lancashire and now live in Yorkshire, so as far as I'm concerned my geographic area covers the whole of the north of England. There are quite a few foods which are well-known up here, but three immediately leapt to mind when I saw this prompt.

Lancashire hotpot - a dish I've had made a number of ways, but essentially is a dish of lamb and vegetables with sliced potatoes on top. Best when the potatoes are thin and crispy.

Eccles cakes - a flat currant-filled flaky pastry. Not to be confused with Chorley cakes, which are similar but not flaky.

And of course Yorkshire puddings, which are crisp, savoury and served with roast beef. My mum used to make one large one for the family, but many people will make several smaller ones instead.

I'm interested to see what everyone else will mention!

Would you go skydiving? Why or why not?

 I'm back on the Long and Short Reviews topics after recovering from my chemotherapy and couldn't resist this one.

Why? Because I used to skydive.

I was bitten by the skydiving bug when my dad arranged for me to do a tandem skydive as a birthday present. Scary? Yes, and freezing cold too while we were in freefall, but I loved it. I went back to Cark Airfield shortly afterwards to do a static line course and the rest is history.

Would I do it now, more to the point? Probably not. I enjoyed it at the time, but I would probably find it a lot scarier now. Still, there are few things more beautiful than floating above the fields on your parachute and watching your teammates float alongside you.

I'm interested to see what everyone else will say!

A story about my best teacher

 This one from Long and Short Reviews is definitely going back a bit. I had a couple of good teachers, but admittedly not many - I still have nightmares about two who used to deliberately embarrass me in class in the name of "bringing me out of my shell" (seriously, to all teachers out there, DON'T do that). So I was a bit limited trying to think of a story about any of them.

Then I remembered my A'Level French teacher, Mr Steeple.

Mr Steeple was a terrifying teacher for the lower years - he was a short man but had a huge, booming voice and a very sarcastic way of speaking if you pissed him off, so we were all terrified of him. However, I didn't actually have him as a teacher until sixth form and, unsurprisingly, he didn't feel the need to do any of that with those of us who were old enough not to need it, so he was just a very good teacher. I was still quite shy and introverted back then, so I didn't get into long conversations with him much until this one class when he was trying to teach us the work for "fairy", which was "fee".

"What's the name of the witch from Arthurian legend?"

Without thinking, I answered "Morgan LeFay." 

"Fancy you knowing that!"

Well, yes. I was, at the time, fascinated by Arthurian legend, not that anyone at school knew this - I had learned long ago never to show interest in anything that wasn't considered normal. But this led Mr Steeple to start asking me questions about the Mabinogion, and it was a great conversation, even though everyone else was staring at us.

I always intended to write Mr Steeple a letter after university thanking him for his help, but like an idiot I never did, so I hope he knew what a great teacher he was.

I'm interested to see what everyone else will say!

Animals I wish I could have as pets

 Having now recovered from my first dose of chemotherapy, I'm back on the Long and Short Reviews topics and quite liked the sound of this one.

I follow a number of pets on Instagram. Most of them are cats and dogs, but there are two in particular I love - one is an alpaca, the other is a lioness.

Believe me, I'm well aware of why it would be a bad idea to have an alpaca or a lioness as a pet, at least without having a huge amount of training and relevant equipment to manage them. But I absolutely love the idea. I have this image of friends coming into our kitchen, looking out the French windows and seeing an alpaca standing calmly in the garden. "Oh, that's just Alfie. Don't mind him."

And, having had one too many salesmen at my door, I would love to have a lioness come padding up alongside me and give them the eye.

I'm interested to see what everyone else will say!

A celebrity I'd like to meet

 I'm back on the Long and Short Reviews blog challenge after recovering from surgery, and this was an interesting one.

As an autograph collector, there are a lot of celebrities I admire, but whether I would want to actually meet them is different. Judging by what I've heard about some who shall remain nameless, it's best not to meet your heroes. 

On the other hand, I'm told Dave Bautista and Keanu Reeves are unfailingly lovely, so they might be a good choice.

However, my choice would be Benedict Cumberbatch. I love his ability to disappear into a role and always find him entertaining - plus I'm told he's also a nice person, so wouldn't completely ruin my good opinion of him by being rude.

I'm interested to see what everyone else will say!

Audiobooks I've enjoyed

 I've taken a few weeks off from the Long and Short Reviews blogs due to medical issues, but I had to pop back in for this one, just because it amused me.

The thing is, I'm not really an audiobook person. I prefer to read with my eyes, not by listening. I don't know why, but the words don't go in as easily and my imagination struggles with audio. So there's only one audiobook I've ever actually bought, and I did enjoy it.

"Last Human" by Doug Naylor, read by Craig Charles of Red Dwarf fame.

I had already read the book, but I decided to buy the audiobook for reasons that Craig Charles would probably not thank me for. I had a huge crush on Craig at the time and this particular book has his character, Lister, having sex on numerous occasions - so I bought the book simply so I could hear what Lister sounded like when he was coming.

Yeah, I can see you all facepalming from here. Hey, it got them a sale.

I'm interested to see which books everyone else will have enjoyed!

Song lyrics that made me cringe

 I did like this one when it came up on Long and Short Reviews's list, because I like watching lyric videos on YouTube (if I want to listen to a song I don't want any background weirdery from the official video, so lyric videos are easier) and have often been surprised at what people have got away with.

The first one that startled me was the Bee Gees' "You Win Again".

 "I'm going to hit you from all sides, lay your fortress open wide

Nobody stops this body from taking you."

 OK, there are a couple of ways that could be taken, but it sounded very dodgy from my perspective.

 And then we have "Smoke Gets In Your Eyes". Not for the same reason, of course.

"Now laughing friends deride tears I cannot hide..."

Um, get some new friends. Seriously.

There are a couple more I can think of, but I think "Young Girl" and "My Sharona" are a bit too obvious. :) 

I'm interested to see what other people will come up with! 

Will you watch the Super Bowl? Why or why not?

 This one from Long and Short Reviews made me laugh, simply because this is a question that pops up in our house every year.

Because I live in the UK, the Super Bowl is something that happens in the middle of the night and gets recorded. Nothing surprising there - I got into NFL while writing "The Hand He Dealt" and still like watching it from time to time, so it makes sense that I would record the Super Bowl.

Will I watch it, though? That's the question.

The thing with NFL is there are a lot of breaks, which means the Super Bowl tends to run for hours. I dare say this is fine when you're having a Super Bowl party with your friends and are happily eating and drinking your way through it, but it's less fun watching a seven-hour game when it's just me on an average evening after work. My husband is an NBA man and has no real interest in American football, so I wouldn't even have him for company.

So what tends to happen is I record it, I find out who won the following day, and then it sits in my Sky box for a while before I give up and just delete the thing.

So what does everyone else think?

New books I'm looking forward to this year

 It's time for a new year of Long and Short Reviews blog posts, and this is a topic I always like - although I have fewer books on my pre-order list than usual.

The first is "The Fatal Unpleasantness at Netherfield" by Claudia Gray. I always love her Jane Austen-inspired mystery series, although I do hope the slow-burn romance is going to burn a little higher in this one.

And the second is "Murder at the Grand Alpine Hotel" by Lucy Foley. Agatha Christie continuances are always risky, but after the many Poirots by Sophie Hannah it'll be interesting to see a Miss Marple one for a change.

Other than that I have seven other books in my "currently reading" pile and will be working on those while I wait.

I'm interested to see which books everyone else will have on their list!

Something I wish I were better at doing

 We're coming up to Christmas now, so I'm closing off this year's Long and Short Reviews blogs with something I often think about at this time of year.

As a teenager I wanted to be an actress. Specifically in musical theatre, although I'd have been fine with pretty much anything. According to my drama teachers I was a decent actress and, at the time, I had a good singing voice - I was classically trained and was good at the musical theatre songs.

Unfortunately I fell down hard when it came to dance. I have reasonable rhythm but I can't remember steps for the life of me. I did ask my parents for dancing lessons but my dad REALLY didn't want me to act and so refused point blank. 

He also started many arguments about my wanting to study acting, which ultimately resulted in me giving up on the whole thing and going to university for something else entirely.

Do I miss it? Yes. I don't sing any more either and I don't have time to get back into it. But I do wish I had been better at dancing and that I could still sing.

I wish everyone a merry Christmas and a happy New Year! 

My earliest memory

 I'm back on Long and Short Review's blog challenge after a short break and had to think about this prompt for a moment. I can't really remember anything that happened before I was about four years old, but there was one memory that stuck out for me.

My grandfather owned a farm and my dad would take us down to Dorset to visit him at least once a year. I can remember running around the fields and the apple orchard, feeding ducklings and playing with the farm cat Ginger (who was friendly enough as long as you didn't try to stop him catching mice), but one thing I do remember quite vividly was an incident with Grandad's herd of cows. One of the cows had a calf, and after seeing the calf was lying down in the field I had climbed the fence and lain down next to it. 

The calf was happy enough to have me as a companion, but my mother was mildly concerned when she found me there, since the mother cow was standing over the pair of us looking very mama-bear and Mum wasn't convinced she would be able to get me back inside without the cow trying to protect me.

Fortunately, after a quick discussion with Dad, Mum managed to convince me that it was nearly time for lunch and to leave the calf to rest now. I remember the mother cow didn't look very impressed when I got up, but she didn't try to stop me leaving, which is just as well as, to my extremely young eyes, she was about the size of a house.

I'm interested to see what memories everyone else will have!

A strange or useless talent I have

 When this topic from Long and Short Reviews popped up I had to answer, simply because this is one I've had arguments with people about many times - ridiculous arguments, I might add, since the complaint is usually "Why do you know all this stupid shit?"

Remembering who actors are and whether or not they sign autographs.

I collect autographs in my spare time and absolutely love the cinema, so I'm quite good at recognising somebody and saying "Oh, that's X, they were in Y and Z. They sign, but only through venues, not via their agent." I've had a lot of people roll their eyes and wonder why anyone would need to know all this, and the simple answer is I don't need to - it's just something that comes from loving films and knowing who it's worth trying to contact. No point writing to Tom Cruise when he only signs at premieres.

I'm interested to see what everyone else will come up with!

Things that scare me

 I'm back on the Long and Short Reviews blog hop after a break as I liked this one. I probably have a few phobias which are shared widely, but I can think of two that people often find weird.

One is thalassophobia - fear of wide expanses of water and what might be underneath them. For me it's less a terrifying fear and more a "let's watch thalassophobia videos on YouTube" type of fear. There are lots available involving rogue waves, krakens and the like, and all of that I find scary - which is one of the reasons I've never been on a cruise, since I get nervous if I can't see the shore.

The other? Mirrors in the dark. I've seen far too many horror films where someone looks in a mirror at night and sees their face distorted, or someone else behind them, or their reflection tells them to get out of the house. There's just something creepy about a mirror at night, which is why I make sure the light is on if I'm in the bathroom.

I'm curious to see what everyone else will suggest!

How I handle bad days

 After a break enforced by a short holiday and some medical issues, I'm back on the Long and Short Reviews blog hop for this one.

Believe me, I've had to find methods of self-care, ever since working at my previous job where people, including me, were off sick with stress multiple times a year. That's less of an issue with my current day job, but it's still something I have to keep an eye on.

So how do I handle a bad day?

It's quite simple really. I have two major guilty pleasures which I combine when I need to chill out.

I pour a glass of wine and put on a quiz show.

I'm not going to explain why I go for the wine, but quiz shows have always been something I love to relax to, and luckily there will always be at least one on Challenge.

So how do you handle bad days?

Books I had to read in school and didn't like

 I had to laugh when this topic from Long and Short Reviews came up. I have often had people ask me if, as a writer, I enjoyed English literature at school and my simple answer is that no, I didn't. The entire process of reading a book slowly out loud in class, paragraph by paragraph, analysing every word in every sentence, seemed designed to destroy any love of literature - as was proven to me by the fact that I enjoyed "To Kill a Mockingbird", which I read by choice, whereas my friends who were forced to study it hated every word in that book.

The two that I remember specifically? "The Catcher in the Rye" and "Lord of the Flies". I imagine I would have enjoyed them more had I not been forced to write essays comparing Roger and Simon or dissecting Holden's memories of his younger brother. The only part I didn't mind was when we were asked to write an extra chapter of "The Catcher in the Rye", which I used to give Holden a second shot with his childhood sweetheart. I liked having the chance to adapt my writing style to match the book, and apparently I did a reasonable job at it since I got a decent mark.

Hmm. Maybe that's why I liked working with Totally Bound on "The Tenant of Wildfell Hall" so much. 

So which books did you read in school and dislike?

Fictional worlds I'd love to visit - and PRE-ORDER

 Having seen this topic from Long and Short Reviews, my first thought was to a universe that might surprise some people, as technically the series is dystopia.

"Uglies".

The idea behind "Uglies" is that teenagers, when they reach a given age, are allowed to graduate from Ugly to Pretty and are given full-body plastic surgery to make them manga-beautiful. They then get to move into New Pretty Town and spend years partying before they have to settle down. The secret, of course - and spoiler alert - is that Pretties also have minor brain surgery to make them docile and less likely to revolt.

I'll be honest, I think I could live with that if I could be made beautiful and not have to worry about my life for years. 

I have a couple of my own books I'd love to move into, while I'm at it - "Watch the Skies" and the "I Heard Your Voice" trilogy, simply because both are paranormal (aliens and ghosts) and I'd love to live in a universe where paranormal happenings could regularly happen, rather than just being the occasional knock on the pipes.

And I just have to announce that I have a pre-order now available:

THE BOYS ARE BACK IN TOWN

Avril Coker, ex-girlfriend of young rockstar Levi Eshton-Gold, is staying at the house of his father, rockstar Ty Eshton-Gold, having been abandoned by her parents due to a pregnancy. However, when Levi arrives home early from his tour with his voice destroyed, he soon makes it clear that he hopes to rekindle their romance.

 

Avril still feels a spark between them. However she also knows Levi is unaware of the real reason Avril is staying with his family – and the deranged fan who caused Avril’s miscarriage.

 

Ty, as the band’s manager, has plans to keep the band going, including a reality TV show and a new album which Avril herself will be singing on. As her and Levi’s passion soon reignites, Avril finds herself working to support Levi’s band Astral Shudder and to help Levi regain his voice – but can Avril and Levi see a future together, or will Levi’s career and his cruel fan keep them apart?

 

Amazon UK: https://tinyurl.com/mr4tuh73

 

Amazon US: https://tinyurl.com/48xz4r5d

 

Smashwords: https://www.smashwords.com/books/view/1799486

 

Kobo: https://www.kobo.com/gb/en/ebook/the-boys-are-back-in-town-9?sId=e65e2815-f710-43a0-b7a7-5943e0738e05

I loved writing this one, so I hope everyone enjoys it!

Humorous book titles

 I love this particular topic from Long and Short Reviews, as one of the benefits of writing romance, especially erotic romance, is you can get away with humorous titles.

A favourite of mine is "In Appreciation of Their Cox" by Janine Ashbless. It is, of course, about the cox of a rowing team who has a multi-way celebration after the team win an event. I had to buy it as soon as I heard the name.

Another is "Here Be Sexist Vampires" by Suzanne Wright. Also explicit, but a really great story with a kickass heroine who takes no nonsense from the sexist vampires around her.

And I had to include my own, which is downloadable as a freebie from the Totally Bound website - "I Can't Believe You Used My Butter". I had wanted to use that title for ages, and the chance to do a free short story inspired by "Last Tango in Paris" was irresistible.

I'm interested to see which titles everyone else will share!

Favourite things to do in the summer

 Decided to have another go at the Long and Short Reviews blogs after a break as this one interested me.

The obvious answer to favourite things I like to do in the summer is probably go on holiday, but that only amounts to one week of the summer, so what do I like to do the rest of the time? I don't do well in heat, so most outdoor activities are a bit much for me - I've never been a sporty person and even walking in hot weather can be hard going.

So my favourite thing to do in summer is sit out in the garden with ice cream and a drink, most likely cider or a cocktail.

In fact, one thing I do like about summer is I have the excuse to eat ice cream whenever I like, be that mint choc chip or blackcurrant sorbet - the more interesting the better.

So what's your favourite thing to do in the summer?

Characters I never want to meet

 Two characters immediately sprang to mind when I saw this topic come up on Long and Short Reviews - one from classic fiction and one of my own.

The first is Angel Clare from "Tess of the D'Urbervilles". I read this mainly because it was set in my dad's home village (Marlott in the book, Marnhull in reality). I really did try to like it, but it's a deeply depressing read, primarily because Tess's love Angel Clare is such a hypocrite. The tragic conclusion comes as a direct result of Angel abandoning Tess for something that wasn't even her fault - he rejects her for lack of purity even while at the same time he tries to take one of her friends as his mistress. Oh, how I hate that man.

The other is Reed James from my three-book series "I Heard Your Voice", "Tamar Rising" and "Spiritwalker". Reed James is a celebrity medium, insufferably arrogant and incapable of considering anyone other than himself. I've had people come up to me and tell me they just wanted to give him a slap, which means I did my job, because I want to give him a slap too. He remains unredeemed, as I couldn't find a way to redeem him.

So which characters would you never want to meet?